help you design the perfect wedding you will want to keep in mind
the following considerations:
What do you want to say about your relationship?
What stories do you want to tell?
Because your wedding ceremony is the public blueprint for what you
expect and hope for in your marriage, what do you want to say about the
meaning of marriage, both for your own benefit and for that of the
What is the style of your ceremony and what is the image you want to
project through it? A theatrical performance, an intimate
conversation, a religious ritual, a festival, a gathering of clans, a
formal social event?
It is very
important to find your officiant early, for he or she is an invaluable
resource in planning your ceremony and in answering any questions you
might have. In choosing this person, you will want to be sure that he or
she is not only willing but able to reflect accurately what you want
your ceremony to convey. You will want to be looking for someone who can
be a spokesperson for you, your values and your relationship. You will
want to find someone who can reflect the quality of your love and speak
meaningfully to you and your partner. Think about the following
Does the officiant reflect or embody the spirit you want to create at
Do you feel comfortable with him or her? Will you be able to express
your preferences about content; speak up about matters of concern in the
preparation of the ceremony; voice objections you might have or ask for
silly, even seemingly trivial things to be included in the ceremony?
Do you like the sound of his or her voice?
Do you have a connection with the officiant that allows you to trust
that what he or she will say will be appropriate for the two of you?
person that has a sense of you and understands the uniqueness of your
Above all, will you value what this person has to say? Will he or she
have delightful, meaningful, moving reflections that will elevate the
ceremony from ordinary, generic, and formal to personal, beautiful and
Last but not least, relax in choosing an officiant. When you are all
together, having a consultation, discussing how you celebrate your love
and the type of ceremony that you have envisioned, you will know if that
minister/officiant is the right one for the two of you. Something will
click and there will be a connection. I suggest that you interview at
least two officiants before deciding because we all work differently.
Ceremony Planning Links:
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